Why we use a cash envelope system (and a fun God story)

Awhile back, I posted about making these cute budget envelopes and shared that use a primarily cash system around our place.  Someone asked if I would share why we use such a system.  This post is an answer to that.  :)
When I was pregnant with Owen, we decided to take Financial Peace University at our church.  I cannot say enough good things about Dave Ramsey’s class.  Seriously, if you want to get your finances under control, take this class (WITH your spouse if you have one) and do the homework!  Ok, enough of a plug.  We wanted to get a better handle on our budget and where our money was going.  We followed the principles closely, but only used envelopes for a few areas and just tracked things in our excel document.  But this last year, we really needed to overhaul our budget and get our spending back on track.  There had been too much swiping the card even though it might not have “been in the budget.”  So here’s what we did:

1. Budget each paycheck.  We sat down and had several “family meetings.”  Yes, they were painful.  But very necessary.  We budgeted every penny that was coming into the house. 
2. Decide on your categories and amounts.  Since we had been keeping track of most things in excel, we had a general idea of what we were spending in most areas.  We decided which things would be paid via automatic payments.  We also decided to keep using our debit card for gas, since I didn’t want to have to run into the building with kids to pay.  Everything else was turned into a envelope category.  (Ours are currently: babysitting, adult clothing, emergency, Emily spending, gifts, going out, groceries/toiletries, hair cuts, home, kids clothing, kids expenses, postage, William spending).  
3. Fill Them Up! After you've decided all your categories and get a paycheck, fill each envelope with the money allotted for it in your budget. Since William gets paid twice a month, we also decided how much would go in at each paycheck.  For a few of our categories, all the money goes in at the beginning of the month (spending), but some other categories, we put half in each time (groceries).
4. When it's gone, it's gone. Now you can spend your money. :)  The one thing that I really love about a budget is that I don’t feel guilty about spending the money.  Before the cash system, I was never really sure when I swiped if we had the money for said item.  But now, if I want to buy a cute dress for Ellie and the money is there, I can get it and not feel bad.  Same with my crafting supplies or some new fancy frozen Greek yogurt.  But when the money is gone, it’s gone.  No going to the ATM or pulling money from a different envelope. 
5. Give it time. We’re still tweaking this as we go each month.   Getting the money right for each category will take a couple of months of trial and error.  But we’ve already started to see extra money in our bank account each month!  Yay!   We can now put that money towards something we are saving up for, like our future fence or basement finishing!

And if you’ve made it this far, I’ve got a fun story for you from yesterday.  I went to Aldi and then Wal-Mart to get all our groceries for the week.  I lost my debit card last week and I only brought our grocery envelope with me.  I was already humbled that I had to use 3 of WIC coupons.  But I must have miscalculated what I had put in my cart, because I was about $25 over what I had with me.  I apologized profusely and then started to pull a few things out of bags to give back.  There were a few things that I didn’t really need.  The cashier took off the items and I was still hunting through my purse for about $4.  All of sudden, the lady behind me handed the cashier a $10 bill.  I said I would just find a little more to take off, but she insisted.  I thanked her and finished up my transaction.  But as I was walking away, she said “ma'am, please wait.”  And then she bought all the items I had given back.  And dang, I’m crying again as I write this.  She bought them, and handed to me quickly.  She gave me a hug as I started crying and saying thank you. 

I cried the whole way out of the store, cried putting my groceries in the car, cried driving home, and cried telling the story to William.  We have had times in our life when we were on her side of things.  But now I am humbled and grateful that I was the receiving end.  God cared about the little things I had wanted to get.  I’ve just prayed God would abundantly bless that sweet lady for doing what she did yesterday.  I also pray my humbled spirit will remember this long after I'm (someday) done being on this side of needing the help.

New Library Card {another cool God story}

So I have to do some more bragging on God.  And keep a record of all the blessings he's dumping on us.  As you know if you've read this blog for any length of time, we love the library.  It probably stems from our weekly trips to the library growing up.  But every Tuesday, we head to story time, read books, get prizes for the reading clubs, and check out a new selection of titles for the week.  (Yes, I know today is Monday, but we have Mom2Mom tomorrow so we have to go to the baby story time or the 3's story time on Wednesday's.)

I have a confession to make, I didn't change my address on my library card when we moved.  As in from when we moved from my parents house way back before Owen was born.  It expired in September, so I knew I would have to figure something else out.  I had heard different scenarios of what they allowed Savoy residents to do.   Upon researching their site, I found that we could buy a card for the price Champaign residents pay in taxes.  I figured it out and it was going to be about $300.  Ouch!  But I sucked it up and figured this was one thing I was going to have to budget for each year.

So last month, I brought all my proofs of address and everything else I needed and was floored when the lady told me that they don't allow Savoy residents to buy any cards now.  We HAVE to use the Tolono library.  Now I have nothing against the Tolono library, I just really love the CPL and Owen knows his routine of going there.  I asked who I could talk to or write because we were devastated.  And then she mentioned that if my employer was in Champaign, they could write a letter and I could get a card through them.

I immediately called William and asked if his boss would be ok with that.  They seemed a little wary since the letter had to state they'll take responsibility if I don't pay my late fines on time.  But then I remembered, hey I work now too.  So I asked Scott, who I do some data entry for, if he would write the letter and I had it in my hands the next day.

So today, we took the letter and and guess what.  We have a renewed library card and it was. . .drum roll please. . .FREE!  Thank you Jesus!  I am one happy book-loving momma today!

loved the new cars that were out today

I was sad we couldn't get a card

but now I'm happy.  I love the library

And PS - Thanks Grandma for his adorable outfit today.  He looked so grown up!  

Mommy Minute

This past Tuesday, I got the privilege of sharing a quick thing at Mom2Mom.  We have instituted the Mommy/Marriage minute each meeting.  It’s just a 5 minute segment on anything. . .could be something God’s teaching you, a cool thing you do with your kiddos, or a way you love on your husband.

I decided to share a little about what we do with Owen to help start getting some Bible in him. :)  We’ve been reading his Bibles to him since he was a baby.  This is his current favorite of his 4 Bibles.But around 18 months I realized, he could repeat things  back to me, so I decided to start doing Bible verses with him.  I printed off a few of my favorite simple verses and decided to read one a week.  We use it as his bookmark and after we read his story, we read his verse.  I have him repeat it back to me and we sometimes talk about it.  Then, I pray it over him.  I think it’s so important to let your kids HEAR you pray over them.  So for example, if the verse is “Children obey your parents because you belong to the Lord.” I would pray that his obedience would stem out of a love for the Lord.  I would also try use this verse when talking to him about obeying me. I want to try to teach him the “why” behind why I’m asking him to do certain things
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After I used my ugly ones for awhile, I finally found these 2 cute printable ones.  No re-inventing the wheel here.  I printed them and “laminated” them with contact paper.  I put them all on a D ring to keep them organized.

{From HomeSchool Creations}

{From I Can Teach My Child}

Hope maybe you can use these with your kiddos.  Here’s a fun story from a friend who started using them with her daughter:
“I have a cool story I have to share with you since you shared those verses with me!   We had friends over yesterday & when it was time to leave, their son threw a fit.  I walked out with them, husband & kids were inside.  Daughter told dad "he was being naughty when they left."  He asked why & she said "he kept saying no, no & wasn't obeying his parents.  He needs to obey his parents because he belongs to the lord!!!"  What a huge blessing to me!  So, thank you for sharing those verses with me:) “

God Is Good – All The Time

Well, there’s been lots happening around here the last few months that haven’t quite made it on blogosphere.  I just didn’t really think you’d want to read about all our problems. Haha.  But I’ve been feeling this week that I put everything else out there, why not be vulnerable with the junk in our lives too.  So here it all is.  No pictures, just a boring text post.  But I want to document this life stage.  The good, the bad, and the ugly – and how God has been good through it all. 

So it all started a little after Ellie arrived. William hadn’t been feeling hot, well for almost a year, but it started to get pretty bad and after some demands requests from me, he went to the doctor.  After a few procedures, he officially got diagnosed with Ulcerative Pancolitis.   The bad is that this is a disease he will have forever and will be on prescription drugs and a special pro-biotic for the rest of this life.  The good is he’s not dying.  So we were just getting this all hammered out, when BAM, we found out we were losing our health insurance.  With about a 2 weeks notice. 

William doesn’t have health insurance through his small office and we were lucky enough to have qualified for state insurance.  But thanks to new legislation that passed, we no longer qualified.   So we started the scramble.  Getting prices and wondering where this extra $400-$500 was going to come from each month.  I mean, that’s more than our grocery budget!  And then worse news, William started getting denied because he has a pre-existing condition.  Health Alliance informed him it’s up there with cancer on their lists, automatically denied.  So we prayed.  And I had a little more faith than my budget-keeping, bill-paying hubby.  And in this last week, this is all the stuff that has happened:

• William’s boss gave him a small pay raise to help off-set the cost of insurance since the office can’t afford to have it’s own health insurance.
• William's boss encouraged him to get licensed and offered him some incentives to help this happen.
• I put some advertising on my blog, which you may have noticed. Thanks for clicking on a link if it actually appeals to you! :) I can see how blogs with huge followings can do it for a full time job!
• We qualified for WIC food assistance.  Yes, that took some humility to write.  And yes, it’s a very humbling process to apply and even use the vouchers at the store.  But God is teaching me a lot through it.  Maybe I’ll write more on this later.  Anyone need some extra milk?   Seriously it’s the one thing we get way too much of.
• I had posted an ad on Craigslist about doing some babysitting again.  I got a few responses but nothing that felt like a good fit.  Until I heard from Carrie!  Tomorrow I will introduce you to our new  “once a week family member,” Sam.  He’s an absolute doll and I’m really hoping this is a wonderful situation for all involved!
• Scott, our investor/money guy needed someone to do some data entry for him.  FROM HOME.  He knew we were in a bit of a tight spot so he offered it to me.  Yes, I’m a little worried about where I’m going to find the time, but am so so thankful for the little extra that will help my insurance to be covered.  You know, just in case I want to have another baby.  Haha, not pregnant.  Just making sure you were still awake.

Wow, thank you God.  So there you have it.  Some of the stuff going on at our place.  We’d still love some prayers for complete healing for William.  And for all the transitions of taking on a new kiddo, trying to work a little from home, and still be the kind of momma I want to be.

Ellison Jakeh's Birth Story

I just love birth stories. And I really cannot stop thanking God for the birth story that I get the privilege of writing right now. I'm not going to leave out any details and there's pictures of almost every stage. So this is your warning. If you don't want to see, just read the below short version!

 The edited/super short/not any fun to read version:  
Wednesday, April 18th

• woke up with contractions around 4:30 am
• dropped off Owen at Anne's at 9:00
• appointment with Ray at 9:40 where he checked me/stripped my membranes and my water broke
• walked over and got checked in at the hospital
• got my dose of antibiotics for being GBS+ on the 10th floor
• Jenna arrived
• walked down the 4th floor
• parents arrived and they all ate Jimmy Johns while I was being monitored
• got in the tub at 12:15
• Ellison Jakeh Pool is born into the water, completely naturally at 2:12pm
• she was 20 3/4" long and weighed 8lbs, 9oz (one ounce smaller than Owen)
• We fall in love.

The non edited/no details left out/it's a long read/makes me cry version:  
Birth preparations
I've had a lot of excitement and peace leading up to Ellie's birth.  I love thinking back to meeting Owen for the first time.  And especially since all the heart stuff got resolved with relatively little drama I really felt God's hand on what was going to happen, good or bad!  I spent tons of time reading natural birth stories and while there are some cooky ones out there, I tried to just focus on the main themes that kept coming up in the women's stories.  Things like something going wrong in their first birth that was a source of inspiration to get through this one (me being 'taken away' from Owen), water, wanting to feel everything, and lots of prayer.  I found myself praying lots over other women's birth stories.  Great friends who didn't get an opportunity to even TRY natural childbirth because of a variety of reasons.  What great inspiration to at least try to do this.

Tuesday, April 17th
Tuesday night was girls night for our awesome small group. I figured it might be the last time I see the outside world by myself for awhile, so I was excited to go. We ate at El Toro and despite the longest serving time I've ever had with Mexican food, the conversation was great with lots of baby talk (sorry to Rachel and Deanna)! The gals joked that I should just have a margarita since it was D-day! We went to Jill's afterward where I had a nice glass of wine (hey, she was fully cooked) and more good chatting.

Jenna flew into Bloomington and 9 and my dad picked her up and took her back to Peoria for the night. Only now have I started to hear how crazy most people thought I was for flying her here and just hoping things would work out time wise. And while yes, I prayed lots about this and had concern, I think I always just thought it would work out. (thank you Jesus)

Wednesday, April 18th
So I'm not sure if it was the Mexican food or wine or probably just God, but at about 4:30 I started noticing that I was having more than just gas pains. William had gotten up early and Owen was snuggled in bed with me after trying to get up at 3. I noticed the pains were coming kinda regularly so I got out my handy contraction app and sure enough, they were coming about every 7 minutes for about 30 seconds. I just stayed in bed, trying not to get my hopes up, and cuddling my little guy. I may have teared up thinking it might be his last day as an only child. I texted William downstairs and let him know he may not be going to work today.  How did people have kids before iphones? :)

Owen and I got up around 6:30 and we all just took our time eating breakfast and hanging out. My contractions were still pretty steady, so I started the barrage of phone calls. Since my go-to neighbor was still out of town, I called Anne D to give her a heads up about maybe having to watch Owen.  I called the midwives to ask if I should just keep my appointment with Ray that I had at 9:40.  They said as long as I wasn't progressing too fast, just come to the appointment.  Jenna, my mom and dad were going to wait until after the appointment for directions on when to come.  I took a shower, shaved my legs, and did my hair!  Haha.

9:00am
At about 9, we dropped Owen off with Anne.  I cannot tell you how thankful I am for her!  She just loved on my little guy all day since my dad ended up staying with us, instead of picking Owen up as planned.  We took a couple pictures and gave Owen lots of hugs and kisses.  At this point, I was still walking and talking through them just fine.

our last picture as a family of 3

We arrived at our appointment and met with Ray and his student.  He checked Ellie first and said she was looking great, especially for likely being in labor.  He asked me if I wanted him to check me and strip my membranes.  He checked me first and said I was a stretchy 4-5cm.  Woohoo, already half way there!  He warned me that when you get your membranes stripped, there's a chance of your water breaking.  I said I knew that, but little did I expect the next minute feeling the gush of water.  Ray commented he was wearing nice pants and got out of the way just in time and then said "cleanup on aisle 4."  I asked the student if she'd ever seen that before and we laughed that she was witnessing all new things here.  Ray got me a towel and sent me off the hospital with best wishes for a good labor.

I made my way leaking over to the 10th floor at the hospital.  I had to stop a couple times, but overall was still feeling like these were super manageable contractions. When we got the 10th floor, they were scrambling to find a place for me.  Every room was full.  I quickly said that was ok, because we were headed down to the 4th!  They never questioned this. Hallelujah.  My nurse Krysteen was the same nurse I had with Owen.  She was FABULOUS!!  Cannot say enough great things about her.  She took me to a recovery room which was already being occupied by another lady waiting for a c-section.  Krysteen got all the paperwork started, got me monitored, and inserted my heplock in my arm.  It was nice not to have it in my hand and she said we'd just wrap it in saran wrap and I wouldn't have to wear a glove.  Yay!

11:00am
Jenna had decided to drive on over as to be early as opposed to late.  She arrived around 11, just as we were getting ready to head down to the 4th floor.  They got a wheelchair, but I walked down just having to stop a couple times to breathe through contractions.  We introduced ourselves to Ellen, the midwife on call.  Wouldn't you know it, she was the only one I didn't see with Ellie.  But I will say now that she was AMAZING and the perfect person to help me deliver. 

I walked around a bit and sat on the birth ball when my parents arrived and they all ordered Jimmy Johns for lunch.  I got monitored for another 20-30 minutes where I realized I really hated laying down on the bed.  I asked if I could get in the tub as soon as monitoring was done.  

Ellen made fun of me as I brushed my hair several times before getting into the tub.  She laughed that I was 6cm and doing my hair.  I told her if she saw my hair for my first birth, she'd be worried about it too.  Ahh, instant relief when I got in the tub.  Not totally take away the pain relief, but it helped a ton.  Here's where I spent the next 2 hours until Ellison was born. 

For awhile, it felt good just to be submerged, laying on my side.  I'd grab William's hand for contractions, but still had a nice good break between them.  I tried to just turn to mush during these breaks and just completely relax. 

I remember still being able to talk occasionally and heard Jenna and William doing their share of goofing off.  My mom and dad continued to hang out in the room.  You could tell my dad really wanted to stay instead of getting shipped off to babysitting duty.  So thank you again Anne for making that possible!

Ellen asked if I wanted to lights lower, and then they turned on the weird red lights.  Jenna made it clear that I would hate the pictures.  I was closing my eyes anyways, so I told them to turn the regular lights back on.

my nurse, Krysteen in blue and Ellen in purple

With Owen, I really only wanted William to hold my hand.  But during the next hour or so, it helped to be on on my knees with William putting pressure on my lower back.  It was interesting that he had to keep pushing lower and lower as she made her way down.  I knew we were making progress.

 

Occasionally, I would get back on my legs or up on my knees and try to give her room to move down.  Work with me gravity. :)  I tried hard to stay "in the zone" and again really appreciate the small breaks between the pain.

They got me a couple pillows that could go in the water. I really appreciated being able to put my head down on something soft.  Things were starting to hurt pretty bad at this point, but I still felt pretty in control as long as William was giving me counter pressure and I reminded myself to not tighten or tense my muscles and let my body do what it was supposed to do.

At 1:12 (an hour into being in the tub) Ellen asked if I wanted her to check me which hadn't done since being with Ray.  I said yes.

This is not me pushing.  This is me being checked.  OUCH.  That business hurts.  Just adds insult to injury at this point. :)  I was around 8 and she could feel her head.  I remember feeling discouraged by this and thinking it would never end.  (little did I know the next 2cm wouldn't take that long).

Ellie looked good the whole time

Ellen reminded me that changing positions was good so I tried to go from back  to all fours, etc.  But it was getting pretty difficult.  I gave William and my mom instructions to write down times and quotes so I would have them document.  I stayed pretty quiet for the most part, but around this time I did say  "Oh wow, why did I do this" and "this was so much more fun with the epidural."  But looking at the times I said this, she was going to be born in about 15 minutes.  It's so true that when you want to cave and give up, it's almost done!

I vaguely remember them getting bustling around and getting gowns on and things out and thinking that had to be a good sign.  It also was feeling really good to start pushing and bearing down towards the end of a contraction.  Ellen asked if I was doing it or my body was doing it and I couldn't quite answer her.  I was pretty sure it was just me, but she said that it wouldn't hurt anything to push a little.  I remember looking up several times at Jenna who had a thoroughly disgusted look on her face.  I had warned her that I had eaten Mexican food and did not poop ahead of time. :)  Even I was a little concerned about the poop, but really when you're in that much pain, you really don't care about Ellen scooping a few things out of the tub.  (I told you I would tell you everything).

Within minutes though, I experienced my body pushing without any help from me.  It was all I could do to not curl up around her and push.  My one leg was pulled back close to me and kept hitting the jacuzzi buttons, causing the jets to go on.  I yelled "turn off the jets" not realizing it was me doing it.  So William had to hold my leg back a bit to keep that from happening.  I remember yelling at my mom to get in there.

 

I pushed for about 15 minutes.  It was the most incredible (and the most awful) feeling in the world feeling her come lower and then slowly out.  Pushing out the biggest poop of your life doesn't even begin to describe it.  Ellen said later that she was crowning for quite a while (that being relative considering I pushed for such a short time).

 I don't really remember feeling the "ring of fire" people refer to, but it all pretty much felt like fire, so I don't know if I just didn't pay attention to it.  I reached down once to feel her head, but it broke my concentration.  Her head finally emerged to much relief and then Ellen got right down in there and it felt like she was pushing her back in.  I remember yelling, maybe at her to stop?  Little did I know that Ellison had her cord wrapped pretty tightly around her neck and Ellen was just getting it undone. 

 Then, with one more big push, she came out!  What an amazing feeling and so incredible how the immense pain is just GONE.

They lifted her out of the water and onto my chest, looking quite purple.  But with a couple little rubs of the towel, she let out a great cry.

 Ellison Jakeh was born at 2:12:30pm and I fell instantly in love.

this one is nice and cropped so you don't see the water

 

 

 

 

 

We sat in the tub for awhile and waited for her cord to stop pulsating which took a bit.  We just cuddled and kissed and marveled at her long fingers and toes.  Eventually, William cut her cord and she became an independent little girl, free from the cord that had given her life the last 9ish months.

again, bad cropping.  sorry jenna

They wrapped her and I handed her to William.  Then we made the precarious journey from the tub to the bed, with the cord still dangling. :)  Within a couple minutes back on the bed and a good push later, I delivered the intact, huge placenta.  Yes, Jenna got a picture and yes, William touched it.  Gross and gross.    Ellen checked me out and said I had one tiny little tear, but said it would heal better and faster without a stitch.  Amen to that sister! 

Everyone came back in the room, they weighed and measured her.  8lbs, 9oz and 20 3/4", just one ounce less that Owen.  Kristy must have been feeling only part of her head, telling me she was likely a 7 pounder.  Maybe that was good motivation though thinking she was going to be smaller than O? She got lots of hugs and kisses and then latched on perfectly for our first session of breastfeeding.

 

And we became a family of 4.

 

While yes, we may have made fun of what my dad wrote on this board, this picture sums up this experience in it's entirety.   I really just cannot thank my "provider" enough for what a story he gave me this week.  A story I cannot wait to share with Ellison as she grows up.  God cared about the little details such as Jenna arriving, me getting a full nights sleep, and he gave me strength to get the birth I had dreamed about possibly having. I am a changed woman from this experience.  There really are no words you can type when talking about meeting the life God formed inside your womb for the first time. 

Ellison means "my God is the Lord."  And what better a story to prove that God really is in charge.

 

Thank you God for this story and how you've woven this new chapter into our lives.  Thank you for trusting us with this new little life.  Help us to teach her how to pursue you and the call you have on her life.  Help Owen feel cherished and not replaced.  Expand our hearts as we start the journey of raising two children.  Thank you for being a God worthy of being trusted and for proving yourself faithful a million times over in the birth of our little girl.